


And I need you now tonight and I need you more than ever

by Fedies



Series: » ❝Brocedes Moments 2016❞ [3]
Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: Bad Race, Brocedes, Car Accidents, Hurt / Comfort, M/M, Panic Attacks, Singapore Grand Prix 2016
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-15
Updated: 2018-05-15
Packaged: 2019-05-07 11:45:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,365
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14670405
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fedies/pseuds/Fedies
Summary: The story is set during the Singapore GP 2016 but the facts described (what happens during the race) are totally my invention.For the two Mercedes the race does not end well at all but Nico definitely goes worse and Lewis is worried about him.Will the Englishman be able to make him understand that he is better than he believes?





	And I need you now tonight and I need you more than ever

Here we are in Singapore, the stage I love most throughout the season.  
The night race has always driven me crazy.  
I'm in trepidation, I can not wait to get in the car but above all ... I can not wait to see Nico again.  
It is from Barcelona that we do not meet, from that hallucinatory discussion.  
We have clarified but I know he is more fragile than ever.  
We spent this week with our families, he in Monte Carlo and I around London and the United States as usual.  
I danced, I drank, I had fun, but I did nothing but think of him in the meantime.  
My engineer reminds me of the order: "Lewis, come on, we have to discuss strategies, Nico is already inside"  
All I can say, however, is "Nico is here?!" and he tells me that he has just arrived but that now I have to hurry up.  
When I go to the pits, I find him in front of me, with the half-buttoned overalls and the white thermal shirt that stands out against the body.  
He has his eyes fixed on the statistics of the last race and as soon as he raises his head towards me I mirror in his blue eyes.  
That bit of common sense that remains to me prevents me from running to meet him and kiss him in front of the whole team.  
They are convinced that we are hardly friends and we make them believe it, to further cover our history.  
He gives me a tiny smile to which I answer, without anyone noticing us.  
He seems to me quite fit and I hope that appearance does not deceive.  
The free practice places us firmly in the lead but in the qualifications the day after, surprisingly, Daniel snatches the pole position for a few tenths.  
Immediately behind me, in third position, there is Nico alongside Max and only behind the two Ferraris; I can hear Arrivabene's screams from our boxes too.  
We are less than an hour away from the race and we are getting ready to get in the car, with the latest interviews and clarifications with the team.  
I enter the bathrooms, where I know I would have found Nico.  
Like every time, here he is with his head bent over the sink to throw up his lunch.  
He rinses his mouth and sees me in the reflection of the mirror.  
I'm worried, I've never liked this unhealthy pre-race habit.  
"Do not look at me like that ... I need it, I need it to ease the tension"  
I could even agree with him if he did not have the same color of a ghost.  
"As you say ... So, ready?"  
"Yes, now yes, you?"  
I smile with confidence: "I was born ready"  
He shakes his head amused, murmuring a 'self-centered' in a low voice.  
In the race we keep personal matters aside, there are no penalty discounts and we know it, we are ready to fight each other as we have always done.  
I will not let him go because he is my boyfriend and he, for the same reason, will not stop pushing on the accelerator.  
Take a look at the clock, it's time to go.  
Before leaving, however, I draw him to me for a last kiss; his lips are a bit sour because of the vomit.  
"Kiss of good luck?"  
He asks me, with a half smile.  
"You do not need it"  
I assure him, before moving away to the track.  
The traffic lights go out, it's my moment.  
Ah, that music, the roar of the engine.  
I had promised myself to be careful about the start and, as far as I seem to have done everything correctly, once again I find the cars pass me along easily.  
Damn, I fuck the radio team live on TV.  
"You're fifth Lewis, stay focused and comeback, now the start is burned"  
I clench my teeth and I'm ready to face the next sixty laps of suffering, but having Sebastian and Kimi in front of me does not help my ascent.  
Everything that comes to me from the earphones is straight on the stops and on the strategy, for a short time I can pass Kimi but with the second pit-stop I find myself even sixth.  
I passed Felipe easily but now the Reds have escaped and my Grand Prix ends with this fifth place that is the emblem of dissatisfaction, although it may serve to bring points at home anyway.  
As soon as I go back to the pits and look at the charts, however, I frown.  
Daniel won with a frightening margin of advantage over Max, finished second, and with Sebastian to complete the podium.  
Fourth Kimi, just before me, and to follow down: Bottas, Massa, Hulkenberg, Alonso, Grosjean.  
The name that interests me is not even in the most distant positions from the points area and it worries me.  
"Nico is not in the rankings, why?"  
I ask the first mechanic who happens to be under fire.  
I was convinced that also him was in the wake of the car that had passed me at the start.  
"He had to retire on the first lap, at the corner 1 Perez practically jumped on the nose"  
I approach Toto and try to calm down, it would not be orthodox to show me so worried about Nico when public opinion always sees us with guns pointing at the front.  
"Toto, I heard Rosberg withdrew, what happened, if I can ask?"  
I try to show myself as detached as possible.  
"Perez has skipped, I do not know the dynamics of his car problems, and he has collided with the front of Nico's car. He's in the infirmary now, for some investigations"  
I feel soft legs.  
The words "Nico" and "infirmeria" in the same sentence do not go well at all.  
"Is he fine?"  
I simply ask, always checking the voice.  
"Yes, probably just a big scare, a little more to the inside and Sergio's front wing could have sliced a hand in. We're already demanding a penalty."  
Congratulations Toto, you are a champion to reassure people.  
I walk away nonchalantly but as soon as I'm not within the reach of prying eyes I start running like a madman towards the mobile medical center.  
Not even the time to enter, which I see Nico go out.  
I begin to thank all the saints of heaven as he walks on his legs and seems unharmed.  
"Tell me, do you have fun making me die of fear, by chance?"  
I ask him, holding him in a hug.  
"It's my new hobby, I'm all whole, anyway"  
When I detach myself, I try to scrutinize his face inquisitively.  
I'm looking for any negative signals.  
"How are you?"  
"I'm fine, I told you, not even a scratch"  
"I did not mean that, I was talking about you, the performance, the race in general ... How do you feel?"  
He sighs, trying to smile reassuringly.  
He does not even believe it.  
He further messes up her blond hair and I urge him to speak.  
"Lewis, I'm fine, I appreciate the fact that you're worried about me, but I do not want you to ask because you're in debt for what happened in Barcelona, the championship is always very hard and I'm very under pressure but I can stand it. I have to bear it "  
Shake my head, is it possible that he is so hard to understand?  
I would slap him sometimes.  
"I worry because I care, Nico, I finally understand how difficult it is for you and I want to help you, seriously"  
He caresses my cheek and I close my eyes, enjoying his delicate touch.  
He always careful, responsible, sweet ... me? The vehemence.  
"Thank you, Lewis. Unfortunately I do not think we can do much, if not change my connotations. It'll be better, you'll see"  
No, it will not be any better.  
Why I will fight with nails and teeth in the league and you will continue to destroy you ...  
No, it will not be better, but I swear I'll try to be better for you, for us.


End file.
